Things to Know about Autism Moms

  Here i write about moms of kids with autism as a group.  
  Like our kids, we are as different as any other moms, but we have a lot in common, especially when our kids are in the young & intensive phase.

  Some of these items will be increased exponentially if the mom in question is single or otherwise without family supports.

1. We love our kids.  Even the most non-maternal of us, we do.   

                                                                                                           
2. Our discipline standards may not be yours, but we are working on it.  Kids with autism have issues with their senses,  with their memory, with generalizing from one setting to another.  They get overloaded so easily.  Especially when they are young, a meltdown may be the only way the kid has to tell you something isn't right.

3. An autism mom's life is a matter of constantly thinking ahead of the kid to figure what seemingly innocuous thing is going to be the last straw.

4. We are tired.  

5. We may not want you in our home.  Ever hear the joke about the kid who came from a broken home and he broke it himself?  He may not have been a kid with autism, but we moms sure resonate with that.  Things get broken when the kid melts down.  It happens regularly.  Things cost $$$ to fix.

6. There isn't a lot of $$$.  $$$ for the expensive therapies that would give our kid a boost in getting a handle on life, $$$ to fix the things he breaks, $$$ to feather a retirement nest. 

7. Ever hear of waivers?  It's government $$$ to help support our disabled kids.  They do not move us onto Easy Street.  Usually they're only theoretically available, just a years-long waiting list.  We apply for it when we could really use the expensive therapies, in the formative preschool years, and "come up" for it when the kid is in high school or about to live on his own.  In ideal cases, it makes life possible, or at least easier.  

8. At some stages in our kid's life, we HAVE no life of our own.  No, this is not a matter of martyr mom so choosing.  Our kids' needs are so intense there is no time for mommy whether we're so inclined or not. 

9. We want to help others like ourselves.

10. We wouldn't give up our wonder-full kid for anything.